Am I Settling??

Question: How do you know when you are settling; in a relationship, career, friendship etc?

Answer: The old me would say “if you are questioning whether you are settling or not you probably are” but now I have a different perspective! To question if you are settling shows a sign of maturity, you’re not so naive to think your current situation is the best thing smoking and by posing this question to yourself you are afforded an opportunity to truly do some self-reflecting. (Please note this post does not apply to married women, this is a question to ponder before you make that marriage commitment)! Anyhow this question is really tricky and I am big enough to say Kristen does not have the answer, but I do have some things for you to consider as you make an overall assessment of your life and measure the areas in your life you feel you're settling in!

As I get older I’m learning that 9 times out of 10 what we want for ourselves is not what God may want us to have. We may want a man whose 6’4 however God has chosen to package your husband in a nice 5’9 frame. You may really want a BMW 6 series, may even be able to afford it, but God has your Kia Sophia sitting at the dealership. See God is already aware of the rough patch you will hit financially in the next 6 months, you aren't. So while His plan for you may seem beneath your standard at the moment, eventually you will realize His plan was the best decision you could have ever made. I can really imagine a young successful woman meeting a man that doesn't have all that she has or more thinking she’s settling but God has a different plan for the relationship. She may have reached high heights alone but as an item God can use them to reach higher heights.To have the money for a BMW but somehow be led to a Kia, maybe your credit score or some other issues, may seem like a settling decision, but God in His infinite wisdom knows what best for you in the long haul. 

Another question to consider is what means do you utilize to measure your standard? If you are comparing your portion to your neighbors, co-workers, friends, TV stars, etc then my answer for you is  NO you are not settling you are caught up in a downward spiral of comparing!! From the outside looking in everything looks better than what you have, it’s not until you are in that situation that you truly see the reality of what’s really going on.

 I trust God so I know His ability and His willingness to perform miracles in any area of life so you never know. The best thing you can do to truly find out if you're settling or not is to  link up with God. Don’t make any rash decisions, continue to develop the person you are, do your part, and trust that the Master plan maker will do His part.

Some situations are temporal! You could be destined to be in a particular relationship for  a specific time while God has your husband someplace else getting prepared. That car you bought does not have to be your car for the rest of your life, it’s just your right now car your luxury car is for another time; same with a job and every other area of your life. Simply put: Be still, know that he is God, if you are going to compare anything compare it to your value system and belief in God, if it can’t measure up to that then you are probably settling. 

~KWK

** ALL IMAGES ARE FROM GOOGLE**