Question: I am pregnant with my second child and I just found out my
boyfriend may have another woman pregnant. He says he doesn't think it is his!
I know he loves me and he takes care of my baby and me. I don’t know what to
do.
Answer: What else is there to do? You are pregnant, correct? How far
along are you? Congrats!!! Since this is just your boyfriend I suggest you
focus on you and your baby. You really only have 2 options: make the best decision
for you and your baby or wait on boyfriend to make the decision for you! I
think once again since we are talking about your boyfriend (it would be a
little different if it were your husband, a concept that requires a different
blog post) your main concern regarding him should be if he is willing to or man
enough to take care of your child! You,
on the contrary, will have to depend on God and your own ability to take care
of yourself and your baby. Boyfriend can up an decide that he wants to pursue a
relationship with baby momma #2, or someone totally different and leave you out
in the cold, (which happens) and in the event that he does……will he still provide
for his child remains TOP PRIORITY!
As far as the relationship is concerned that’s totally up to
you. Do you want to be in a relationship with him? Not his potential, who he
used to be, or who you hope he becomes when the baby gets here, but do you want
to be with the man that you know he is right now! Not the apologetic, I know I
f’d up, please forgive me, I will do whatever it takes to get in your good graces
man either. You know what I mean: the core of, the moral being of, the on most days he's______________ manß
Him…… do you want to be with that man? If so stay, just be prepared for a
heartbreak! Now please understand, it is possible that you may NEVER experience another heartbreak from this man again; but in the event that you do, you owe it to yourself to be prepared for the "just in case"!
I don’t suggest you going into competition mode. The fact is:
your child could potentially have a brother or sister who needs just as much
love, support, attention, and care as your child does. This battle solely lies
between you and your boyfriend, not baby momma #2 or the possible baby to come.
I don’t suggest you waiting until you find out if the kid is his or not before
you make a decision. There is no real point in that; his or not his, the
principle is the same: HE CHEATED and the possibility still remains the same: HE
CHEATS! I do not suggest you making a rash decision because you may regret it.
Take some time alone. Spend some time by yourself….you and God are all you need
right now. Your family and friends will give you mixed messages, there is no
telling what your boyfriend is talking about, and left to yourself your
emotions will have you looking the fool, so take a breather.
This situation is tough, I myself was involved in something
similar (I was not pregnant, but someone else was) and I tell you it took
months for me to really get myself together. I waivered with my decision for a
LONG time, toooo LONG now that I look back at it but my main concern was never
ME or God’s best for me. It was him, his feelings, what he needed, what he
wanted and other stupidity that would have left me feeling far worse if I had chosen
to stay as opposed to getting the heck on & being sad for a year or so
instead of being miserable for some YEARS or so if I had stayed.
After all you do have a bundle of joy inside you! (THINK ABOUT
THAT FOR A MINUTE) focus on that instead of the drama around you. All things
will work together for your good if you keep your focus on Christ, your baby,
and your well-being! BE ENCOURAGED!
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